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Fetishes

You all ready know you have a sexual fetish. Simply put, a sexual fetish is something deeply ingrained which defines your sexuality in a profound way. It may be as simple as a penchant for feet, hi-heel shoes and leather clothing or as complex as a need for psychological humiliation. This proclivity towards being turned on by some thing or some act that is usually not associated with generic sex might be plaguing to you. Though it provides a consistent source of pleasure and a reliable sexual trigger, it also instills feelings of guilt or shame. Oftentimes it's a secret you've never disclosed to anyone; not even your spouse.

Sexual fetish or paraphillias do not ever go away. They are too deeply ingrained into your sexual subconscious. You probably don't have an outlet but nevertheless these thoughts are ever-present in your masturbatory fantasies. It feels isolating to have to deny a powerful part of your sexual energy. You wish you could share this with a loved one but you might fear rejection that's real or anticipated. Instead you keep your thoughts to yourself. This nagging repression turns into deep depression, anxiety or anger.

Get proactive and learn to embrace your unique sexuality. I have helped many people understand their fetish and successfully incorporate it into their lives. We'll work on feeling comfortable and confident about your sexuality. In doing so, you'll naturally be able to effectively introduce your partner to your sexual needs.

- Jackie A. Castro, MA, MFT © 2007